Saturday, December 27, 2008

Take off your grumpy pants or I'm going to rub you with my pinkeye

Friday morning I woke up with an alleged pinkeye infection in both eyes. It was terrible. Nevertheless, we got it all together and made it to the Greenville, SC, airport on time.

There we met the first of our problems. LaGrace had apparently not gotten anything from Santa, hasn't been watching the news to know that there are LOTS of people who would be grateful for her job, and her underwear must have been very uncomfortable.

I empathize with customer service people. Especially the airlines. I know that they get lots of nasty people coming through, and it must be a very tough job. I always try to be extra nice to them, and if there is a problem, I try to be very polite and respectful. (I can only think of one time when I was ugly to a customer service person, and it involved great pain, walking on crutches for about a mile, and this person then telling me I didn't have an appointment to be seen. Sorry I snapped at you in 2004, check in person at Bethesda Naval Hospital.)

So, anyway, LaGrace got upset with me when I asked her about the regulation that allows military personnel to check one bag free. Then she got mad because we failed to tell her that one bag we were checking contained a car seat, which evidently is free. I didn't know. I failed to go through the US Airways customer service training class, so yeah, I missed that.

After she yelled at us, was unbelievably rude and disrespectful, she chased us down as we went through security, and yes, she yelled at us some more because she hadn't realized we were carrying an infant on board.

LaGrace, if you're out there, I wish you a happy New Year. Please buy some new underwear.

Our second problem involved anothe woman who must have bought the same brand of underwear. On our packed flight out of our connector in Charlotte, Liv's feet kept hitting this lady's seat. We caught her feet in midair, we admonished her, but let me tell you, a 4 year old's leg stick straight out from the seat, and they do hit the back of the seat in front of them every time they readjust. We did all we could to keep her content and still, but SHE'S 4.

Let me also say that we have traveled about 6 times now on the airlines with my two children, and I'm usually met with comments about how good they were, even when I don't think that's true.

So finally, after complaining to her husband, she turns around and says "Excuse MEeee" to Kris.

Here is what I wanted to say to her--"Hey, lady, what do you want me to do? Would you like me to duct tape her to the seat? Would you like her to scream and cry for the next hour, because that could be arranged, so pick your poison. I'm sorry that the holiday spirt has left you so quickly, I'm sorry that your teenage kid is ugly, I'm sorry that your husband is stupid and tried to put an oversized bag on the plane, and I'm sorry you have a strong resemblance to the Wicked Witch from the Wizrd of Oz. GIVE ME A BREAK."

Lady in Seat 19B with a stick up your ass, have a Happy New Year. Please buy some new underwear.

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